I'd simply like to add a few things to funky@'s wonderfully concise, on point, answer. Like funky@ I do have a few deep intimate relationships, and, my heart being rather a rather greedy flame, desires more, while also perceiving some aspects where and when I live, which presents some rather subtle, and at times, insidious limits to stoking this fire anew and ever more.
There's another facet to the one way communication funky@ indicates and yet links to some of the others as well: Interiorization. What I mean by this is that when what we call 'issues,' or 'problems,' arise we are often quick to look for the 'cause.' Cause and effect. We've internalized this expectation to such an extent, via the churches, the schools, the nuclear family, work, and so on, that it has become normal. This normalcy itself nothing but expectation on a cosmic level, part of a totalizing cosmological model if you will.
When we seek a 'cause' for what we perceive as problematic within such a framework, we tend to treat others and ourselves like prime-movers, unrelated to the whole excepting that which each 'I' magically casts its effects, and somehow from 'within' each of us, capable of ruining what was once perceived as going along smoothly. It is never the totality of relationships within which we are embedded, taught, maintain, perpetuate and yet over which we each have no say or control. Instead we are expected to ask: what is wrong with him/her, and perhaps more the socially approved point of view: what is wrong with me?
Insidious, and wholly acceptable, individualism: the cross-bearer, the diseased soul, the demented, the ill...the 'cause' of the dysfunctional whole, internalized into a soul-concept, a measureless, undimensional point labeled as 'you' or 'I'.
Is it any wonder that we fear, clam up, distance ourselves? Is it any wonder that media both reflects and perpetuates memes of chattering, shallow, smart-assed comebacks, as the way we relate as friends and family? To go deeper is to come face-to-face with the potential for problems and the consequential self- and mutual- blame of our causal model gone both internal and normalized. 'I' and 'you' become loci for the heft of alienation, violent behavior, fragmentation, i.e. the wake of dysfunction left behind the (anti-)social models and practices of state/capital. What was once the sinner now becomes the commodity of therapy and therapeutics, the prison industry, and so on.
If any anarchy is to be fought for in one's life with, alongside others, perhaps this may entail undermining and destroying this stupid model of the world as much as we're able within our relationships with one another. This means not allowing patterns of self-blame to arise as unquestionably they do so often. Anarchy, after all, is only as deep and broad as we allow for, create, expand and experience; each and together with others.
