thanks, clicking on the terminal! X-D
You're getting to why i trust my feelings above everything else, whereas my thoughts tend to serve as a filter for when I'm feeling things very strongly. In the end I trust my feelings more than my thoughts, because they bypass the ultra-western control mechanisms of the words we use...i tend to get really sick of the conversations that anarchists have, because they're stuck in this whole "words are reality" hermeneutics-of-suspicion crap. For example, a lot of people who are friends of anarchist thought think that being anti-fa is like a badge of honor, because the theoretical opposite of an anarchist is a fascist, nazi, cop, authoritarian, right-winger, etc., but having read a lot of the stuff that anti-fa sympathizers write, a lot of their activities have very little to do with combating fascism. So much of the anti-fa scene around portland is just based on spectacular street fights, now that has to do with the white supremacists and fascists but they don't really understand that it's all just a performance where the fascists win every single time. To me, the ultimate anti-fascism is about a less strictly political approach to "non-violent communication", whereas suppressing the things that people say is also a form of jackal speech, at least when using those dynamics.
Part of the problem with fear nowadays is that it's a very disembodied thing, talking about this actually gives me a pretty extreme panic attack. To put it most simply, i just can't trust anybody...
"can anything other than time and first-hand experience serve that purpose?"
the things that can serve a second best are logical deduction and deconstructionism. So here, we become detectives, we start with something we know about a person, then we ask more more questions, getting more questions and answers, until we can safely make conclusions. Yet, as I'm sure you know, the conclusions that people online make are very frequently bogus.
conclusions ~= assumptions ~= generalizations ~= fears ~= prejudices
The thing I typically hate so much about people these days is they use all these absolutes, and i've figured that rather than totally discarding the "to be" form, our path out of that is using more qualifiers when talking, because then it becomes something that resembles doubt and accuracy...
I know this just adds to the confusion, but i've just generated some stuff for you to chew on for a bit.