this answer is my favorite by the way, the goal of so many people (including myself sometimes) is try to be certain type of individual, but those of us who really try to be that type of person realize that it's impossible, the closest you can get is some sort of roboticized charicature/role. There is a poem I wrote about this subject that addresses this:
The War on the Self
Resolution and satisfaction:
Are these the elements I cannot find?
To seek victory is to beg defeat,
pitiful is the struggle of my solitary mind.
It is the tyrant fixating on comfort dearly,
who casts his shadow when he is ignored.
Who dares to control what he knows not,
consuming his freedom along with the world.
I ask myself so frequently,
I repeat to myself so loudly,
The angry conflict running my soul.
And I cannot for the love of me solve the mystery,
of the illusion of self-control.
Now that I say these words to you,
I feel so naked and not so great.
But I'm enamored with my confession so freely,
That I have become the thing that I hate.